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Bar/bas mitzvah

בר.בת מצווה


Bar/bas mitzvah


To the Bar Mitzvah Boy/Bat Mitzvah Girl,

On the day of your happy occasion your name will be mentioned at the gravesite of the holy Rabbi Shimon bar Yochai. The gates of Heaven will be opened for your success and happiness.

On this great day your son or daughter are entering into the yoke of Torah and mitzvahs.


Rabbi Shimon bar Yochai writes in the holy Zohar that there is reason to be as happy on this great day as one is when a child is getting married.


It is portrayed in the holy Zohar how Rabbi Shimon bar Yochai made a great feast when his son Elazar became bar mitzvah; he invited Torah scholars and was very happy. He explained the reason for his happiness - because on this day a holy soul comes down into the bar mitzvah child.


Therefore, it has always been customary to make a festive meal in honor of the bar mitzvah.


Does happiness brings happiness or G-d forbid sorrow?


It has always been a custom to give charity to make poor people happy, as explained in the Midrash and in the Kaballa: Whenever G-d has granted a person a happy occasion in his home he should make a meal for the poor and give charity. This will protect him from Satan mixing in any disturbance or grievance into the happy occasion.


It also says in the Kav Hayashar (Chapter 10):

A person must be careful when he makes a festive meal for a mitzvah such as a circumcision, engagement, wedding or bar mitzvah; he should make sure to include poor and needy people amongst his invited guests and should see to it that they have nice things. For if one celebrates a happy occasion for his son or daughter and does not invite poor people to the meal, prosecution will be aroused from the wicked Lilit and from Satan until some suffering and hard measures are brought onto the one who makes the meal. Thus we find by Job who made a feast with his children and there were no poor people there – Satan prosecuted until he killed Job's sons and daughters, and he took away his wealth and animals, and his wrath did not rest until he brought personal suffering to Job.

Therefore when one makes a meal he should be careful to invite poor people to the meal so that Satan does not prosecute; moreover, when he invites poor people to the meal, "the prosecutor becomes the defender".


The Creator also promises that "If you make my (poor) people happy, I will make your (family) happy."


Note! You have invested so much in the bar mitzvah celebration. Don't forget to insure your investment. A meal for the poor is a shield, an all-around encompassing insurance at a nominal price; not only for the bar mitzvah day – it is a great help for your children to get by their adolescence in peace.

Do you want your parents and grandparents in Heaven to come celebrate at your joyous occasion?

It says in the holy books that this is a way a child respects his parents -when his parents come from Heaven to see him during his happy occasions such as on Shabbat and holidays, or when he makes a circumcision for his son, or a meal for his bar mitzvah or wedding, and so any joyous occasion of a mitzvah. Rabbi Shimon bar Yochai wrote in the holy Zohar (Pinchas) that parents come from Heaven to see a person's happy occasions and celebrate with him. But a prerequisite for their coming is for him to, as if, include G-d in his festive occasion – i,e, Talmud scholars and the poor and needy should enjoy the meal he has made. Parents are G-d's partners as it says (Kidushin), "There are three partners in a person - G-d, his father and his mother". G-d will take his partners, the parents, out of Heaven and so that they too can see the joyous occasion of their son in This World.


A meal for the poor donated in honor of a happy occasion, an ancient Jewish custom, opens the Heavenly gates allowing the Creator to bless you from His great treasures with a long life, blessed children and livelihood in abundance.

When the meal is held, at least ten people sit together, with the power of a group whose prayers are likely to be accepted. The names of the bar mitzvah boy and his parents are said and the merit of the blessings that all the poor people recite on the food is attributed to the bar mitzvah boy and his parents.


The cost of the meal for the poor can be on various levels:

(To donate and submit names, press Paypal Donate Button)

A. The best – a donation equivalent to ten portions of your guests at the bar mitzvah.


B. A donation of  $155 (a respectable meal)


C. A donation of  $80 (regular meal).

Make sure to fill in the names of the bar mitzvah boy and his father and mother so that we can utter their names to be blessed.


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